1st week home

I can't believe we have been home for a week!  If I had the time I should've posted every day, because I feel like I have already forgotten all that has happened in a week!!

Our first few days home were a little bit of a blur.  We were very jet lagged and having a little trouble adjusting our clocks.  We had two nights where Vivian was up around 3 and 4 a.m., and so we were pretty tired the first few days home.  Vivian has been VERY attached to me (like, won't let me out of her sight or touch for more than a few minutes).  This is hard b/c I am so out of practice with having a toddler follow me everywhere!!  But, this is great because she is attaching well to me.  Lucky for me, my parents are here helping  us with the kids.  Vivian has learned that having a "Grammy" and "Pop pop" can be pretty fun and she loves my mom and dad

Rob's parents and brother came to meet Vivian and she loved all of them, also.  I did not get any good pictures of her with her other grandparents, but I got this one of her with Rob's brother

Vivian and Uncle Billy

She has had many "firsts" this week.  For example:

Her first time in a swing

not so sure at first

but she got the idea!

First trip to the pool

she was NOT impressed with our pool, even though her siblings and cousins really wanted  her to be!

First trip to TCBY

camera malfunction but you get the idea

First "girls only" shopping trip to Old Navy

Then later in the week to the mall

Vivian is doing better and better every day with her siblings.  She has 3 people that constantly want to pick her up and play with her and who don't quite understand that she is still trying to figure all this out.  I have to say, we are really, really proud of the older three kids.  They are giving Vivi lots and lots of love, and they are not yet getting it quite back in return.  Yet, they just keep on giving, and keep on trying.  They are being very patient and I know one day, when she returns their affection, it will be awesome for them.  But for now, I see a lot of this "help me" look on her face when her siblings are around

But I also see more and more sweet moments every day, and her trust in them is growing.  She is actually quite bossy!! It is hilarious to watch this itty bitty little girl boss these big kids around.  And they do whatever she wants!

Vivian had a hard time with some sleep issues at the beginning of the week.  She started crying and crying every time I would put her down for a nap or bedtime.  Luckily, it has improved as the week went on. While in China and when we first got home, Vivian wanted nothing to do with the purple blanket we bought her. She would kick it off and push it away.  Kind of like she didn't want anything to do with us consoling her. I'm sure there is some psychology behind this, but the other day when I was putting her to sleep, she pointed to her blanket and then pointed into her pack n play for me to put it in with her.  All of the sudden, she wanted it.  She hardly cried that night and when I checked on her later this is what I  found:

I still look at her every day and can't believe she was in an orphanage for almost 3 years.  I wonder if it will ever stop breaking my heart to think about.  I also look at her every day and can't get over how she feels like the perfect daughter/sister for our family.  Like, really.  She seems like JUST.THE.ONE we were supposed to find.  How could it ever have been ANYONE but her?

I feel like, just as she decided to accept her blanket,  every day she accepts our love a little more.  Every day she lets us in a little more.  Trusts us a little more and depends on us a little more.  Shows us a little more of her real personality.  It is going to be a process, a long one, to get her to understand that we are here FOREVER, but we are willing to do whatever it takes for however long it takes to make sure she understands that.  To make sure she realizes that our love is not temporary.  It will be a long road, but that is OK, this girl is SO worth it.

"And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.

And love will not break your heart...."

-Mumford & Sons