Monday, July 1, 2013

Gotcha!

We have Vivian!!!  She is just perfect!  She is sleeping next to Rob right now as cute as can be!  I apologize in advance for all the pictures in this post, I can't control myself....


The past 24 hours have been a whirlwind.  At this time last night I think I was as close to not going through with this adoption as any person has ever been!  Sunday was a REALLY hard day for us.  We were exhausted .. jet lag definitely was setting in.  We were homesick.  And we made the move from Hong Kong to Nanning.  If we thought we were in China when we were in Hong Kong, well, we were wrong.  Hong Kong is NOTHING, and I mean, NOTHING like Nanning.  In HK, almost everyone speaks English.  Menus, street signs and hotels have English writing everywhere.  Not so in Nanning.  As soon as we landed everything just felt different.  Not an English word to be found.  Not an English-speaking person to be found.  My anxiety started going through the roof.  I just wanted to go home.  Everything that could possibly go wrong today was going through my mind.  I was missing my kids SOOOO much.  I realized I am a total wimp.  I got a good night's sleep, but was still not feeling great this morning.  I was completely panicked.  I have NEVER been so scared of anything in my whole life.  The gravity of what we were about to do came crashing down on me and I have to admit, I freaked out. I really thought I was going to puke all morning long.  I could not even text my hands were shaking so bad.  Luckily, Rob was a cool as a cucumber.  Totally confident and ready to meet Vivian. He is so like that.

At 12:30, right on time, our guide got the call that Vivian was here.  She came on a bus this morning with the director of the orphanage and her nanny.  Our guide went down to the lobby to bring them up and I will never forget the feeling of those last few minutes waiting for them to walk in.


 And then, they came in.  And as quick as they came, they left.  And everything changed.....





I held her and that was it.  complete peace.  She was VERY sad and VERY scared.  She cried for about the first half hour and then just kind of moaned.  Then she stopped crying, but every 15 minutes or so, she would get a sad lip and silent tears would stream down her face.  This went on all day.



We were told by the orphanage director that there are 30 other toddlers in her room at the orphanage, so I am sure she was missing her friends.  We finished up some official business and just played in the room for the next few hours.  When housekeeping came we decided to go out for a walk and she did pretty good but still just seemed scared to death.





We were able to Face time with the kids, Rob's parents and my parents and that was awesome.  I so wish our kids were here with us right now.


The good news was she is totally attached to me!!  She literally will not let me put her down.  She only put weight on her legs for about 5 seconds today.  When I try to set her down her little legs cling to me for dear life.  If we get comfortable in one position and I move at all, the lip comes out and the tears start.  She is very sensitive and very scared and that is completely expected.  She is also super tiny.  None of the clothes I brought are going to fit right.  She is not so sure about Rob yet, but we know that will change in the next few days.





I have so much more to say, but I need to go to bed.  I was debating with Rob whether we should put her in her crib or let her sleep with us.  He made the point that she hasn't had a mom for 2 1/2 years, so if I wanted to sleep with her the first night we had her, it would be OK.  Suffice it to say, she is in the bed in the middle of us


What a brave little girl she is.  And so beautiful.  We are so incredibly lucky and blessed.  It is truly overwhelming.


"By adopting a child and helping them reach their potential, they help us reach ours. An adopted child is not an unwanted child; to the contrary. They are a child who was searched for, prayed for, cried for, begged for; received by arms that ached, making empty hearts full. Love is meant to be shared." 



15 comments:

  1. Loving every second of this post!! My heart is feeling those jitters as I read. There is nothing like it in the world!!! I love all the pics. She is an absolute doll! And that lip could bring anyone to their knees!!! So happy for you and can't wait to see the amazing change that occurs over the next few days and weeks...a true testimony of what love can do! The pic of you holding her while she sleeps reminds me of the pic I have of Wesleigh and I right after we got her. It's my favorite photo of all time. LOVE!!!!!

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  2. She is absolutely precious!!! Sending love to you all. Can't wait to see her sweet face with a smile on it :).

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  3. So sweet! Congrats! You will be amazed at how she blossoms over the next few days/weeks/months!! It is a wonderful feeling! Soak it all up!!

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  4. Love ALL the photos. Congratulations to your beautiful family - Vivian is SOOOOO precious and beautiful. Glad to see the bonding - the carrier and co-sleeping will really be good! Look forward to reading/seeing more when you have time. Many blessings!! Cathy

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  5. Congrats ! She is beautiful. Enjoy the trip of a lifetime. Guangzhou is much like Hong Kong. You will enjoy the sites and sounds there. In the meantime- have fun bonding with Vivian in Nanning.

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  6. Hi I'm Heather! Please email me when you get a chance, I have a question about your blog! LifesABanquet1(at)gmail.com

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  7. Dear Rob & Maureen,
    You finally arrived! Wow, what a story... All those feelings and thoughts crossing your mind in the last ours before you met Vivian. It breaks my heart to read about Vivians first day. It must be so hard for her. No idea about what's going to happen, the new life which is about to begin. But it's nice that she feels comfortable now with you Maureen. That's a good start. Hopefully she feels save with Rob as well soon. She is such a lovely girl! And tiny indeed... I wonder if Gui-Fu will fit the clothes we bought for him... We shall see. There are plenty of shops in Nanning I assume.
    I wish you all a nice stay in Nanning. Hope that you have the chance to visit the orphanage. But I found out tht's a couple of hrs from Nanning.
    Thank you for sharing your feelings. I'm looking forward to your next post.

    Leonore

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  8. So glad to see her in your arms! Beautiful!

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  9. She is so beautiful! Loved reading (and seeing) this post!

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  10. This post brought back SO many emotions for me. You really hit the nail on the head with your descriptions. It is so good seeing her in your arms. Every day gets better! And soon you will not remember what your family was like without her.

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  11. Hold her tight. Love on her and sink her in as she sinks you in. You're doing beautifully mama!
    nancy

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  12. Hi Maureen,
    CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! What a blessing to see your sweet new daughter in your arms.. I agree with Jennifer.. That lip is something else!!!! So excited to see you in China with your new addition! We will be praying that each day is full of blessings! Enjoy this special time!!

    ~Diana (Pearl River)

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  13. Hong Kong was the perfect blend of China and the US. I loved it. Once you get to GZ, it will be a little bit better. They are used to adoptive families and you'll see a ton of other families there (ie, people to speak English with, who are having your same emotions.)

    Congratulations with your little girl.

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  14. Oh Maureen...this post is so honest and raw and beautiful. I love that you admit how scared and nervous you were. Few people admit that. I also love that you felt total peace when she was in your arms. It shows on your face too. I prat for that peace in sweet Vivian's heart. Congratulations!!!!!

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  15. What a story! May God continue to bless you two people for being so brave, for opening your hearts. May God bless your children, Vivian's soon-to-be siblings, waiting back in the States. Congratulations on your new, dear little girl.

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